It All Falls
Webmaster's note - if you are, or know of, the author of this marveollous humourous poem, please contact me so you can be given recognition.
Transcendence riddles, buzz words, kamasutra, soul,
Uri Geller bending forks, and brown rice in a bowl.
Searching, questing hidden karma,
Chanting path of whole food dharma,
Macrobiotic Kabbalah, Rosicrucian stew,
Astrological peyote, and symbolical Kung Fu
Seven steps to bliss, fox-trot cosmic dance,
ecstatic peak experience, hypnotic sacred trance.
Sit there in a lotus, visualize your nose,
See the Buddha in your mind, and strike a Tai Chi pose.
Count your breaths and cast the Ching, and at that fateful juncture,
See your mood ring flashing color, stick your toes with acupuncture.
Pranayama with your mamma, yogurt in your tea,
soybean curd pie in your third eye, boogie with your chi.
Biofeedback for your energy blocks, ear plugs for your TM,
An herbal pillow for your samadhi tank, and fiber for your B.M.
Biorhythms, esoteric quantum physics talk,
Take the new age things you've learned and fry them in a wok.
Expand your head into the stars,
And search the world for avatars.
Baba Rama Maha Sri, swami this and that,
Hari Bagwan Mukte Jee, tell me where it's at!
Andrew Weil and Ekankar, and Pan and Zeus and Hera,
Upanishads, and diet fads, and snorting aloe vera.
Kirlian photography of auras bright with tantra,
Ida Rolf, the zen of golf, the magic power of mantra.
Enter the world of philosophy, metaphysics and inner space,
Read Gurdjieff, and Castaneda, Laotza, and Edgar Cayce.
If you haven't hearda Goethe, read Buddha or Rajneesh,
or start an ashram whole earth cult with bran flakes in your quiche.
Ancient writings, gladness tidings, pages wrote by saints and sages,
tells of fates and pearly gates, handed through the ages.
Tantra, mantra, yantra, yin and yang and Jung,
Do the words of secret meaning sit like dung upon your tongue?
The way of tofu twelve-fold path is described in books you've read,
But the Tao of how is not for now, it's written for the Book Of The Dead.
Five fold, four fold, eight fold path?
To find your way you'll need some math.
A change of pace, a 10k race, a mystic jogger's high,
Biorhythm space cadets of Sufi and Baha'i.
Surfing psychic alpha waves on the shores of inner space,
Seeking wisdom, light and union, paradise and grace.
Join the movement, buy the hype,
What's your sign, what's your type.
Crowded hot tub fast lane, along the astral plane,
whole grain, soul train gurus, with cocaine in their vein.
Lucid dreams and Amway schemes, and marathons and drugs,
Parables and asanas, and enemas and hugs.
There's hypnotism for the phobics,
manics jog and do aerobics.
Program your fate ala neuro linguistic,
Put on a robe and act like a mystic.
Pretend to be clairvoyant, with cannabis in your pipe,
Let the housework go to hell and say, "I'm not the sensate type!"
Talk about rhythms, vibes and levels,
Poltergeists and spooks and devils.
Spirits, voices, UFOs, leprechauns and ghosts,
Priestly bards and tarot cards, and chalices and hosts.
Enter the underworld and drop your persona,
Transform yourself in an herbal sauna,
Hang a crystal around your neck,
it might not work, but what the heck.
Raise your low blood sugar, primal scream your lungs,
take a Gnostic out to lunch, and learn to speak in tongues.
Leave your job and drop your spouse, enter the night sea journey,
Experience your birth and transmigration, but bring a divorce attorney.
Enter analysis three times a seek, follow the watercourse way,
Treat your neurosis like halitosis, and get your insurance to pay.
Chart your planet's progress and dialog your inner healer,
With Mercury in your second house, you can become a Shaklee dealer.
Put yourself in an Orgon Box, and keeping sight of your goal,
Meditate on carrot juice with Silva Mind Control
Macro, micro, big and teeny,
Thoughts can stir your kundalini
Open up your chakras, and go beyond your head,
A juicer for your kitchen, a surrogate for your bed.
If E.M.F. jewelry is more than tomfoolery, live in a Faraday cage
Sync your brain with a binaural beat, hail the new millennium age.
Glasses for your chakras, mirrors for your mind.
Mind that boggles, flashing goggles helping you unwind.
Experience your deep depression,
Guide your own past life regression,
And find out who you used to be.
You are your very own family tree!
Satori in a pyramid, hai ku from a saint,
Spinning through the new age like a dervish till you faint.
But these solutions and helpful suggestions
turn your answers into questions.
And suddenly it all falls into place!
A Place unchurned...
We were chasing thoughts like butterflies while our toast burned.
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Poem by anonymous
(the file on my hard drive is dated 9 October 2000 and unfortunately there is no other information regarding the spource of the poem - Webmaster
Page uploaded 21 July 2008